Did you knit for yourself before you had babies? I knit for myself a little before I had babies, but I didn't knit a lot, period, pre-children.
Are any of your kids interested in knitting? Anatole, Sabina, and Daisy and Agatha all know how to knit. Anatole likes to do it off and on. He knits exclusively in the round, and makes hats and dolls. Agatha knits voraciously; she makes animals and doll dresses. I did not teach any of them to knit. Sabina and Anatole learned from books, and I think LB's mom taught Agatha.
Is Irma an accomplished knitter too? My mom IS a good knitter (don't listen to her!) and certainly modeled knitting throughout my childhood. My earliest knitting memory is being in Spain, sitting next to my mom while we watched Dracula on TV. She was knitting an enormous blanket in off-white for someone's new baby. I had a ball of yarn and two needles, and could not understand why jabbing the ball repeatedly with the needles didn't yield the same results for me as they did for my mom.
What is your favorite pudding flavor? My favorite pudding is homemade vanilla, but I haven't made it in years. Great. Now I want pudding.
Do you shave your legs every day? What about in the winter? I shave my legs most days in the spring and summer, and about once a week in the winter. For awhile there I got my legs waxed, but it involved long periods of intolerable hairiness in between waxings.
Have you ever been to BlogHer? I've never been to BlogHer, and I'm fuzzy on what it is other than that it involves women who blog. I've never met another blogger that I didn't know already from some other context, but apparently I will soon by meeting Miss Chesty LaRue.
What was the first blog you ever read faithfully? The first blog I read faithfully was Saartje Knits, quickly followed by Danceswithwool.
What do you do with all those sweaters once the kids have outgrown them? When my kids outgrow their sweaters, they hand them down the line or we give them away. It feels wrong to put them in a box for the nebulous future, removing them from circulation. I've saved a very few of them, such as Olive's coming home from the hospital dress.
What can a knitting mother do when her kids insist that the latest hand-knitted jumper itches, no matter how fine the merino? Oooohh now this is just awful. Every knitting mother fears this. Have you tried fingering weight cotton or linen (if it's the fuzziness of yarn that bothers them) or alpaca or cashmere (if its the barbs of wool that bother them)? Or maybe low-necked vests (to be worn over a shirt) that don't touch their skin at all?
If your kids don't "get" knitting when/if you teach them, do you persevere or let it go, hoping they'll come back around to it one day ? I didn't teach any of them to knit, acted like I didn't want them to learn at all, and frequently said things like, "If any of you touches my yarn you're going to be in BIG TROUBLE." This resulted in most of them wanting to learn and enjoying it. If you've begun teaching a child and he/she doesn't get it or doesn't want to persevere, my advice would be to back off immediately.
If you didn't have Princess Clover, what pet would you have? I'd like to say if we didn't have Clover we'd have a dachshund, but LB informs me he'd rather adopt an emotionally disturbed 15 year old with endstage syphilis than get another dachshund. It would be a smallish dog, for sure. I'm allergic to cats. Now that we have a cavalier spaniel though, I can't imagine ever owning a different kind of dog. Despite her perpetually bewildered expression, Clover's actually very smart and has the perfect temperament for our family: gentle, but not too fragile.
What is your family's favorite thing that you cook? I'm not a very inspired cook. I make rigatoni with meat sauce every Monday, which all of the children inhale except Daisy (Daisy is my pickiest eater, and she won't touch pasta, rice, or pork that isn't bacon). The one meal I make that they'll all eat to the bursting point is brisket, and homemade mashed potatoes with lots of cream cheese, butter and sour cream mixed in. I'd say their favorite food as a group is latkes, which LB makes. They all eat a lot of fresh fruit, or what passes for fresh in the land of eternal winter.
Do you ever knit for yourself or just for others? I don't knit for myself very often. It just takes too long to knit for grown-ups, and I rarely wear sweaters. Also, once I've knit something and have handled every inch of it, I find I just don't want to be around it anymore. It's like making cookies and filling up on the batter to the point where you don't want to eat any of the finished cookies.
How did you and LB know you wanted to marry each other? Well, I knew because there was no way I was going to the trouble of leaving a marriage so that I could just "date" LB, and he knew because I told him so, emphatically. This is also how he knew we'd be having children right away.
How did you come to have 6 children in your family? (I think you know what I mean: did you (plural) start out saying, "We must have 6 children!" or what?) I think we originally planned on having three. When Sabina was a baby we started talking about adopting another child with a congenital amputation, and we adopted Anatole when Daisy was around 2.5. While we were waiting for Anatole to arrive we found ourselves wanting another birth child, and we assumed it was just impatience over Anatole not being there yet and that the feeling would go away once he arrived. It didn't, and so we had Agatha. After we had Anatole we knew we planned to adopt at least one other child "at some point," and when Agatha was about 6 months old my friend Susan forwarded an email she'd received saying that the agency that represented Anatole had begun a program placing African American newborns. We called the agency and they acted very cool about it, as if our chances of being matched with a baby were slim to none and that it would be a looooong wait. After LB Fed Exed the home-study to the agency, I emailed them telling them the paperwork was on its way. The phone rang 30 seconds later saying they had a baby for us. LB was on a plane to Texas to get Dana three weeks later. With Olive, it was more a case of knowing we wanted to have another baby someday and thinking that since I was over 35 it might take awhile (it didn't) so we shouldn't put it off.
This is a long way of saying we didn't set out to have six; it just kind of worked out that way.
Is homeschooling exhausting? At times, but honestly--my most exhausting experience in the name of my children's education was finding appropriate and affordable schooling for Olive. Then there are all the IEP's, teacher conferences, etc. And that first year, the DRIVING.
Sometimes sadness seems to come through in your essays about Olive. How do you and LB cope with the difficulties? (I sometimes feel spiritually drained with ONE neuro-typ toddler.) Yup, I do get sad sometimes. For me, coping involves blogging, knitting, kvetching to LB, praying, lots of dialogue and face-time with those wacky Perlmans, films about desperately unhappy Swedes and Icelanders, and let's not forget Dr. Bowtie. I also try to give myself lots of treats, even if it's just Solo soda and the fancy gingersnaps I can only get at the Sweden Shop. When I was little and would go shopping with my mom, she'd get an inordinate amount of pleasure from buying a new oilcloth for the kitchen table. I've inherited the gene for mood-enhancement from even a small purchase.
I asked LB how he copes, and he said he feels he does best when he keeps his head down, does his work and doesn't look too far ahead.
Can we see pictures of your boys more often? Here's several boy pics, showing off their new polo shirts.
Do you ever think about having more children? No. There were times when we had two or three when I wondered how a woman could ever feel like she was done--I just couldn't imagine being able to say I was not going to have more children and feeling happy about it or even okay about it. But I am satisfied now, and I don't feel like there's a child floating in the ether that was meant to be in our family.
What made you decide to homeschool your children? Have they always been homeschooled?When Sabina was a toddler, we planned on her attending a Waldorf school since LB had gone to one from K-12 and enjoyed it. But when we went to our local Waldorf's fair and open house, we weren't happy with the attitude of the teachers we met and their animosity toward parents. The prevailing wisdom was that we as parents were no doubt ruining our children and that it was a good thing we were handing them over to people who knew what they were doing. (I hasten to add that this was a problem of this particular Waldorf school.) Homeschooling seemed like the next best thing, and since we've moved about every 3 years since then, homeschooling has worked well for us.
I meant to inquire (privately) before you called for questions, but I was wondering if I had ever sent you a copy of my CD? Strangely, the lyrics are suitable for children of all ages. No, you've never sent me a CD and I'd love a copy! I'd also like more postcards. And a copy of "Can't Dance," because I can't find that issue of the Southern California Anthology.
Who wrote Cavalleria Rusticana? This is a longstanding family joke, a trivia question often posed by my maternal grandfather. I didn't know the answer before checking Wiki, but I knew that Alexander the Great's horse was Bucephalus.
Does it weird you out that complete strangers, albeit fellow-knitters (like me, both counts) read your blog? My son (5 yrs old) thinks Daisy is cute and wanted to know if she could come play. (Don't worry, I told him she doesn't live anywhere near us, but that's a good example of how you send little ripples out into the world - how do you feel about those ripples? I think it's kind of cool...) I love love love for total strangers to read and comment on my blog. As therapeutic as writing is for me, the process is not complete until someone reads what I've written. I've never been an "I write for myself" kind of person, and I'm perplexed by people who say they don't care how many blog hits they get. My hit counter is very important to me, and I care deeply about seeing those numbers go up. I am too lazy to write and take pictures for just me. Without you, I'm just Marginal Mom talking to myself!
And I'm totally into the ripples. The only time I felt strange was when I got a private email from the social worker at Autism Academy, telling me she'd found my blog. My first thought was Ohmygod the social worker now knows that I'm sad sometimes about Olive's autism. I'm so ashamed. What will she think of me?
My Facebook keeps suggesting that we be friends? Would you be my FB friend? Sure thing! Remember that I don't always know your names from your commenting IDs. If you're a reader and I've ignored your face book friend request, it's because I don't recognize your name. Just give me a heads up.
Do you use any particular curriculum for your homeschooling? From reading some of your posts I have wondered if you are "unschooling". We currently use Calvert, and supplement with extra fiction. We also use the Wordly Wise series for extra vocabulary and reading comprehension. No unschooling here: I'm too chicken to blaze a new trail.
Do you belong to any homeschooling co-ops? No.
Do you write out lesson plans? I don't write out lesson plans, since Calvert is very comprehensive and does it for me.
Have they always been homeschooled? Yes. Olive is the only one who has ever attended regular school.
Have you ever knitted Clover a little doggie coat? No; she is extremely furry and is more often too hot than too cold. She also has a tendency to be...aromatic. The coat would be a fetid little rag in no time.
I'm curious about the homeschooling. Being a teacher at the same secondary school that my boys go to, I would never homeschool because I know that I could never do the 'boring ' subjects justice (Maths, Physics, Chemistry, etc.) How do you make sure that you don't mainly teach the subjects that you're interested in and leave the others the scraps of time? (I know I'd struggle with that one...) That's why we use a curriculum--I don't have to second guess how much time we should spend on each subject because it's all spelled out for us. Also, for older grades we use the program's advisory teaching service, so a disinterested third party teacher reads and critiques their work. It gives me peace of mind.
How is your Crohn's doing these days? I remember you cursing Coconut Macaroons a long time ago. I have IBD and can relate a little now. I won't eat macaroons anymore either. Knock wood, my Crohn's has been in medication-induced remission for many years now. Other than a few flare-ups when I ate the wrong thing (corn on the cob, a glass of red wine, Total cereal with raisins, and the Great Macaroon Debacle) my gut has been treating me pretty well.
If you had your very own personal chef to cook for you, what would you have for dinner? What would your children request? LB? I'd start with samosas from an amazing Indian restaurant we loved when we lived in Concord, CA (name forgotten), followed by the barbecued pork with noodles from Just Won Ton in The Sunset and the green onion pancake from China Pepper in Nob Hill (now closed). Then I'd have apple fritters and the Riverwalk steak from Shenandoah Cafe in Long Beach, CA (also closed! Sob!). If I had any room left over, I'd have tiramisu from Cafe Milano in Pacific Heights and the chocolate cayenne pepper cake from Cempazuchi in Milwaukee. It would probably save time if I ate the entire meal in the ER and had a Fenergan suppository before the appetizer. Kind of the opposite of an amuse-bouche, if you will.
Now I'm thinking I should have made room for the turkey, cranberry sauce and stuffing sandwich from the Meeting Street Cafe in Providence. As for LB and the children, they can have everything I can't finish, except the desserts. I'll leave you with this final tidbit: I'm possessive about my food, and I can't handle the sharing thing that many women do when they eat together. Sneaking your fork onto my plate is a good way to get stabbed in the back of the hand.
Who the heck is Ashraf? What a good question! I'm going to put this on my Who are all these people? page. Ashraf is our landlord. He's an architect, and he designed this house for his own family. Since he and his family lived here for eight years, I feel his presence much more than I've felt the owner's presence in other houses we've rented, so his name comes up a lot. We really lucked out with this house: Ashraf and co. are the nicest landlords we've ever had, and we've done a lot of renting.
What did you do before the kids? You come across as an extremely smart woman - where did you learn all that fabulous stuff? I got my BA in English from Cornell University in 1987, started in the MFA program in fiction writing at Brown U. in 1988 (where I met LB) then transferred to the MPW program at USC where I was graduated in 1991. From then until I had children (1994), I was a disgruntled admin. assistant working mostly through a temp agency called Temp-o-Rama. They've since changed their name, which is too bad. Temp-o-Rama = best temp agency name ever.
I'll be in Waukesha the 2nd weekend in August - want to have tea? I promise I won't make you dress up in Ren Faire costumes.... Hee. Yes! This year we will make it happen. Please send me your number again.
How tall are you? 5' 1 and1/4" , and I'm very proud of that 1/4 inch.
When I first started reading your blog, I asked if you had ever thought of writing a book and you said you were waiting to hear back from a publishing company. Have you heard back yet, or were you kidding? Totally kidding! I wish! I'm not writing a book, and have never submitted my blog to a publisher. Nor have I ever been approached by a publisher.
Do you get along with your mother in law? Does she read your blog? Yes, and yes. She also comments from time to time. And sends me presents, like The Doubtful Guest book you see in the previous post.
Did LB know your first husband? No.
Why did you move last year from Chicago to where are you now? We moved to be in the NSSED school district, and to be closer in general to schools for autistic children (for some reason, most of the services for Autistic kids in Cook County are in Northbrook).
And where are you now anyway? We live in Northbrook, IL. If you look in my sidebar to the right, you'll see categories called Small Town and Northbrook that have entries about the area where we live, including pictures of the street signs at our intersection. Yes, I'm a hide in plain sight kind of gal.
I first started watching you on E-Bay when you made darling little knit outfits for Olive, and loved what you made because the outfits (sporties?) looked so comfortable and wearable compared to so many of the custom made outfits. Do you still sew for the girls? My sewing output decreased dramatically once Olive started school and I was driving all the time, and I assumed that once we moved here, I'd start sewing again. The reverse is true--I haven't sewn a stitch since we moved here last July, and I'm not really sure why that is. Right now my industrial machine is out for repairs and a lube job, and I'm hoping that when it returns I'll be inspired to start sewing again.
Who taught you to knit? My mom, when I was 7 or 8.
Are the other children jealous of the attention Olive gets? Sometimes, but usually she's the jealous one! More than once she has tried to push another child--or Clover--out of my lap. Olive attaches to people very quickly and will loudly object if she feels someone is getting too much attention from one of "her" people. One time Daisy accompanied us on a visit with MRMaria, and Olive was a quandary over what bothered her more: that Daisy got to talk to Maria, or that Maria got to talk to Daisy.
At what age will you let your girls date? That one's up to LB and he says, "It depends."
Do your girls like to shop? Do they really get along as well as it appears? Yes, they all like to shop (the boys, too) and though they do get along most of the time, they have their bicker-fests like any siblings. I just don't tend to whip out the camera in the middle of a Cold War over who gets the blue toothbrush and who's stuck with the green.
Is Lo your only sister? Do you get along with her? Yes, and yes. I'd say more on that topic, but she's squeamish about displays of affection.
Does any of your family get angry/embarrassed by what you write about them? Nah. They are all a bunch of hams, and my siblings are not above counting how many times they've been mentioned and complaining if one gets more column space than the other. Hen once had an inferiority attack over a Knitters-Knitters entry because Lo's name had a link and his didn't.
Are you Catholic? No.
Do you still call Sabina and Daisy Beans and Pod? And collectively The Legumes? Do any of the others have similarly vegetable-y nicknames? Aw, Sabina stopped allowing me to call her Beans as soon as she was old enough to say, "Stop calling me Beans," and I haven't gotten to call Daisy "Pod" since she was around two. But sometimes I THINK Beans and Pod in my head VERY LOUDLY. Anatole is mostly called Tole, and I call Dana by his real name (Hen calls him "The Dane-ster"). I've called Agatha "Cream Cheese" since she was a baby, and thus far she hasn't corrected me. Olive gets called Nesty, Miss Naughty-Pants, Sweetness, Cuteness, Pin-cess, Owhiffs, Specialton, Little Strange-O, and any number of nicknames that reference her cuteness and uniqueness. We refer to the group of them as the 6-pack or the entourage.
Comments